The Bible and Church teaching teach that sex is sacred. Its purpose is procreation. Courtship is a serious preparation for marriage. It is not a stage for premarital sex. True love waits. Sexual intercourse is a response to God’s command in the Book of Genesis to procreate, “to go to the world and multiply” and not just to enjoy pleasure. Christians are advised to avoid fornication or premarital sex before marriage. Thus, Christian women , in particular, must discern and examine the attitude and character of their boyfriends whether they are called by God to be their spouses. The following are dangerous signs that their boyfriends are only after of sex and not aiming for a lifetime commitment in the sacrament of marriage:
1. He only notices how you look and not your personhood.
You are more than your physical appearance. You have your own set of values, religious beliefs, intelligence, life goals, and plans for a lifetime commitment in marriage Men who are sincerely interested in a relationship with you will compliment you for your personal qualities and dignity as a person. They would also appreciate your talents and abilities, and sense of humor.
Men who are focused on having sex with you will tell you how great your hair looks or hot your ass looks in that dress. He would always tell how he noticed your sexy body parts. If your boyfriend is only interested of your body, then your relationship with him is going nowhere. Find another guy!
2. His conversations always turns sexual.
If your boyfriend always talk about sexual matters with you, even if done in jest, then he is not serious to bring to the altar of marriage. If you tell him about your successful sales presentation and he remarks how about how the client probably couldn’t take his eyes off you because you’re so beautiful and look so hot in your business suit, then your man is probably after only of your body. When you tell him you can hardly wait to go home and just soak in a hot bath, he’s quick to tell you, he wishes he could be there to wash your back, then he is not serious in your relationship. It’s time to say goodbye to him!
3. He does not invest in your relationship.
Men who are only interested in sex don’t want to invest more time or money in developing a relationship with you. They are looking only for convenience and the easiest way to gratify their needs. They would never bring you to expensive restaurants for fine dining nor spend more money for text messaging and calls to contact you. They don’t buy expensive gifts. They would prefer to bring you to a burger or pizza house to save money. They usually disappear and look for another prey once they get what they want from you.
4. He wants hug, kiss, and then to go straight to the bed with you.
In a relationship where someone is excited about knowing you, curious about your life and what you think, there are so many things to talk about. In a relationship where someone is only interested in using you for sex, there’s nothing important to discuss (Segel, 2017). Love waits! If your boyfriend is really serious to wed you in the church, he would wait for the honeymoon!
5. He doesn’t introduce you to his family, close relatives, and friends. He’s in a hurry!
If your boyfriend is not introducing you to his family, close relatives, and friends, he has a sinister plan for you. He is not interested of establishing a long-term commitment with you in marriage. Remember that marriage of two people is also a union of two families and their network of relatives and friends. If he is keeping you away from his family and relatives, he’s probably thinking only of a short-term relationship with you and may only be thinking of having sex with you! He’s in a hurry. If this is the case, start looking for another guy worthy of your love!
6. He’s Handsy
You’re out together in a movie or even in public, and he constantly wants to kiss you, rub you, grope you, and tells you he can’t wait to get all naked, then stay away from him.”If he can’t keep his hands off of you, then that’s actually a bad sign that he is only interested of your body and not your real self as a person. Dump him! Find another guy who is mature and serious of marrying you! (Segel, 2017).
7. He says he loves you immediately.
The first stage of love is infatuation. If a guy tells you that he immediately loves you the moment he saw you, he’s lying and more likely be looking only for sex. He is not a serious in your courtship and to bring you to the altar. True love takes time and effort to know the attitude, value system, and personality of one’s partner.
GIF Credits: Giphy.com
Schwimmer, L. (6 Dec 2017). “10 Signs he Only Wants Sex with You!.” Huffpost. Retrieved from https://www.huffingtonpost.com/larry-schwimmer/10-signs-he-only-wants-to_b_7688110.html.
Segel, A. (17 June 2017). “6 signs a Guy is Using You for Sex”. Elite Daily. Retrieved from https://www.elitedaily.com/dating/sex/signs-a-guy-is-using-you-for-sex/1994771.
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