6 Top Signs a Guy Isn’t Interested in You Anymore

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1. He Stops Texting or Calling You.

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If your boyfriend stops calling or texting you regularly the way he used to do, then his interest in your relationship has gone cold. A guy who truly loves you will always find ways to contact you no matter how busy he is with his job or work.

2. He Flirts with Other Women In Front Of You

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Flirting with other women in front of you is a sure sign that he has lost interest in you, or he is indeed a playboy who is incapable of bringing you to the altar. Why would he flirt with other women if he is really serious in your relationship and intending to marry you in the future?

3. His Body Language Changes Around You

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“When a guy likes you, he might not say so directly, but his body language will. He’ll lean towards you to build intimacy, face his body towards you in group situations, and find reasons to touch your shoulder or arm (like when he makes you laugh)” (Bastion).

If your boyfriend is no longer as sweet and caring as he used to be, then he probably lost his interest in you. It’s a sign that you need to move on and find another suitable partner.

4. He Doesn’t Pay Attention Like He Used To

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Romantic relationships call for intimacy and mutual care on a regular basis. This entails every partner to provide special attention to your loved one. If your boyfriend is no longer giving you the special attention he used to give you when you started the relationship, then it’s a sign that he is no longer interested in you. Watch out for inconsistencies of what he says and what he does. If he says that “I will never, ever love somebody more than I love you” but starts to take you for granted, then it’s time to find another guy until you’ll find your match and get engaged.

5. You Always Have To Text And Call Him First

You will know that your man is no longer interested in you always have to text and call him instead he taking the initiative to contact you. In this case, he may be busy with other things or maybe having other relationships with other girls. A guy who is truly in love with you would make sure to contact you no matter how busy he is! A change in pattern in your communication is the biggest sign that he is gradually abandoning you!

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6. He Doesn’t Get Jealous If You Mention Seeing Someone

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Jealousy is not always a negative reaction. Being jealous can be just a way to guard the exclusive relationship from intruders. If your boyfriend is jealous when you mention that you’re seeing someone is just a normal reaction and a precaution for him that you might get tempted to entertain other relationship. A Romantic relationship is basically dyad or pair with 2 people falling in love, not triad or any form of polygamous union. So, if your guy is not jealous even if you mentioned the positive traits of the person you met, then this can be a sign that he doesn’t care because he loses interest in your relationship.

GIF Credits: Giphy.com

Reference

Bastion, N. (n.d.). “The Top 10 Signs a Guy Ins’t Interested in You Anymore”. Retrieved http://www.vixendaily.com/love/top-10-signs-a-guy-isnt-interested-in-you-anymore/

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Why does society pressure us to conform to it?*

*This post is based on my answer in Quora.com at https://www.quora.com/Why-does-society-pressure-us-to-conform-to-it/answer/Ven-Ballano.

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Answer:

Society must achieve its goals and development plans, articulated in terms of norms, for the promotion of the common good of all its citizens. Thus it pressures people to conform to its social expectations and norms.

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Society has formal and informal norms. The informal norms consist of customs, traditions, or folkways, while the formal norms consist of laws, the state’s official and written social norms. Norms serve important social functions in society. They guarantee social order and integration of people as well as serve as deterrence against crimes and other forms of deviance. All societies, whether primitive or state society, have norms which pressure inhabitants to conform , otherwise they face sanction and punishment by the state’s judicial system.

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Society must have some forms of coercion and pressure to force people to obey the norms and preserve social order, otherwise it would gradually disintegrate due to anarchy and crimes groups.

One must take note that society’s norms or laws by themselves do not necessarily force people to conform. For the German sociologist Max Weber, there is no law without a specialized staff or group of law enforcers who would implement the letter of the law.

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What pressures people to conform to society’s norms lies in the law enforcement system, in the psychological coercion to people’s minds that any criminal or violator who break the law will surely be punished by an efficient police force or group of enforcers.

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Every society has certain long-term and short-term goals as articulated by the government which must be obeyed by people. The goals are legislated into laws by the legislature. These goals must be achieved by the state for the attainment and protection of the common good. That’s why urban democratic society are “ruled by laws, not be men (or women).”

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Democratic and republican societies usually invoked the police power of the state to pressure its citizens to conform to state laws. This is an inherent power of the state that can overrule individual human rights in the name of social welfare, public order, public health, and the common good.

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GIF Credits: Giphy.com

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8 Scary Signs Your Boyfriend is Abusive

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It is sometimes difficult to know the difference between when your boyfriend is having a bad day and when he is  being abusive. In one study, 57% of college students say they aren’t sure how to identify relationship abuse. Abuse can take different forms. It can be physical violence or emotional, psychological, and verbal abuse. are all forms of abuse too. Abusive people try to control you by using threats, coercion, manipulation, and other tactics.

To spot an abusive boyfriend is not an easy task, especially if the romantic relationship is still new. Usually, young men who are courting ladies would hide their negative traits and abusive tendencies to impress them with good traits. But the mask of abuse that boyfriends wear will gradually be revealed during trying moments as the relationship grows older. Signs of their abusive behavior would gradually become manifest.

Based on research, the following attitude and behavior of boyfriends are considered scary signs that they are abusive to their female partners in their romantic relationship. In this case, girlfriends are advised to leave the relationship to avoid further abuse. A healthy relationship is based on trust, respect, and true love and not on control and abuse of the other:

1. He’s domineering and self-centered.

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In a healthy relationship, one partner must not control the other. If the boyfriend is domineering and self-centered, he’s not just acting as  a “man,” but the reality is that he is establishing a power (im)balance in the relationship. He’s trying to control you, making the relationship one-sided and exploitative.

2. He shows a Lack of Respect

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If your boyfriend does not respect you as a woman and decent person during courtship and engagement, how would you expect him to do to you after your wedding day? True love is based on mutual respect.

3. He Treats You as a Sex Object

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If your boyfriend is only after of sex and has no plan of observing chastity before your wedding day, leave him. Some boyfriends would just disappear with other women after they treated their girlfriends as sex objects. “Love waits” as the saying goes. You will only be married once in your life. Just wait for the honeymoon after your wedding to make your love a blessing.

4. He’s in Constant Jealousy

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Jealousy can be a sign of insecurity of your boyfriend. A real and mature man is not jealous of what others have. It’s difficult to live a partner who is constantly jealous of others. Jealously can lead to physical and emotional abuse.

5. He’s Hyper Sensitive

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Hyper sensitivity is another sign that your boyfriend is abusive. If he is too sensitive to many things, your relationship will suffer. Leave him. Actually, women like their men to be confident, relaxed, mature, and broad-minded.

6. He threatens violence.

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He makes statements such as, “I’ll cut your throat,” but then dismisses it with, “I really didn’t mean it.” He may be joking, but his constant threats to you reflects his state of mind. It’s only a matter of time that he will actualize these threats to you during difficult situations.

7. He has sudden mood swings.

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If your boyfriend is moody, he can’t be reliable and dependable. He can become unpredictable and abusive. It’s difficult to establish a stable relationship if one partner has a sudden mood swings.

8. He has a past of battering women.

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He admits to hitting women in the past, but states that they or the situation brought it on. In this case he has a history of abusing women. Battering can become a habit which is difficult to stop. As the relationship grows older, expect him to do to you what he had done to other women. It’s time to say goodbye to him!

GIFs Credit: GIPHY.COM

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My Latest TV Guesting: Responsible Tourism

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Thank you TV5 and Cignal TV for allowing me to share my sociological insights live on responsible tourism in your talk show “AGENDA” with the popular travel blogger Lillian Cobiao and TV host and columnist Cito Beltran. The episode will be replayed in channels 8 and 250 of Cignal satellite TV with 2 million subscribers. God bless! Let us be responsible as tourists and travelers!

Schedule of replays today Nov. 7 at Channels 8 and 250 of Cignal Satellite TV of our show: 12:00-1:00PM, 4:30-5:30PM and 11:00-12:00Midnight.

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A special thanks to Madelaine Lacson, the interview producer of the show!

https://web.facebook.com/ONENewsPH/videos/914328918755290/?t=0

 

 

Responsible Tourism and Boracay Re-opening

May I invite all to view and listen to our live discussion in the Cignal TV program AGENDA (Channels 8 and 250), hosted by the veteran journalist and TV host Cito Beltran, on responsible tourism and the re-opening of Boracay, tomorrow from 8am to 9am at TV 5 Media Center.

I’m one of the 3 resource speakers of this TV show. I hope you view us there and God bless!

Click this to view the ad: One News Agenda