How do you know that you’re already falling in love? What are the sure signs that you’re targeted by cupid?
A person who falls in love usually thinks that his or her crush is unique and super special. This belief is accompanied by the inability to feel romantic passion for others. Since each person has a unique social upbringing and cultural orientation, manifestations and signs of falling in love may differ from one individual to another. But those who live in urban societies, the feeling of falling in love is generally associated with the following behavioral manifestations:
1. Tend to see their beloved as “perfect”
People who fall in love tend to be blinded on the negative traits of their beloved. They tend to focus on the positive qualities of their beloved, while overlooking his or her negative traits. They also focus on trivial events and objects that remind them of their loved one, daydreaming about these precious little moments and mementos.
2. Experience emotional and physiological instability.
People who just fall in love with another person usually experience some sleepless nights thinking about their loved ones and emotional instability. Some studies show that falling in love can often lead to emotional and physiological instability. The person in love often bounces between exhilaration, euphoria, increased energy, sleeplessness, loss of appetite, trembling, a racing heart and accelerated breathing, as well as anxiety, panic and feelings of despair when his or her relationship suffers even the smallest setback. These mood swings are said to parallel with those of the behavior of drug addicts.
- Spend much time thinking about the beloved.
From the moment the person wakes up in the morning to the moment he or she goes to sleep at night, the person who falls in love often thinks of the beloved. He or she spends more time entertaining intrusive thoughts about the other. “Those who are in love report that they spend, on average, more than 85 percent of their waking hours musing over their “love object.”
- Feel a strong empathy for the other.
The awareness and concentration of the person who falls in love revolve around the beloved. People who are in love generally feel a powerful sense of empathy toward their beloved, feeling the other person’s pain as their own and being willing to sacrifice anything for the other person. There is a sense of unity between the person who falls in love and his or her beloved. The pain and happiness of one is also the pain and happiness of the other. But this sense of unity between two married persons is different from the sense of unity in falling in love during the first date. Marital union is founded on reality, i.e., on the real knowledge of the character and personality of the partners, while in romance and infatuation, the union is usually based on fantasy and imagination.
- Feel emotionally dependent on the relationship.
People in love regularly exhibit signs of emotional dependency on their relationship, including possessiveness, jealousy, fear of rejection, and separation anxiety.
- Daydream of Spending their life with the beloved forever.
People who fall in love tend to spend much time thinking that one day they could spend the rest of their life with the beloved. They long for emotional union with their beloved, seeking out ways to get closer and daydreaming about their future together.
- Smile more often while thinking about the beloved.
People who are in love tend to smile while thinking about their beloved alone. They experience weird, giddy feelings of happiness, even when they’re not physically present to that special person. They tend to smile more than the usual, especially if something can remind them of their beloved such as a romantic text, post, email, e-card, etc.
The strong feeling of falling in love with another person during the first encounter or date could not be considered as real or true love. It is an initial stage of personal acquaintance between partners, and an infantile and precarious phase in the long process of attaining true love. This stage is often called as infatuation. Young people tend to consider infatuation as true love. But there is a big difference between infatuation and real or authentic love. The former is unstable and fleeting, while the latter is stable, mature, and long lasting: ‘Till Death do as part.” As Churchill would say: “True love is falling in love many times with the same person.”
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