5 Secrets Wives Won’t Tell their Husbands

1. Her True Feelings about Her Past Boyfriends.

omar-medina-films-1612679_640

Web Hosting

It is always a taboo or prohibited for a wife to tell her husband how she felt with her former boyfriends or past partners. Even if the husband would personally ask her, the wife would not usually reveal all about her past relationships, especially if she feels that her secrets can affect the marital relationship.

The wife usually keeps secret her special feelings with her former boyfriends or partners to avoid the jealous feelings of the husband. Keeping this type of secret could benefit the marriage. Revealing how she felt with ex-boyfriends can hurt his feelings. What is past should stay in the past.

2. Her Sexual History

couple-2300103_640

Telling the wife’s past sexual history to her husband, especially she had different partners in the past, would be unnecessary as this could cause jealousy or personal conflict–unless, of course, the wife is infected with STD that can affect the husband’s health. The topic on her past sexual history can also bring about harsh judgment and ridicule and overshadows her true character. While it’s a good idea to talk about how you maintain your sexual health and promote sexual responsibility, the rest of the wife’s sexual past is her business only.

3. She Did Something Dumb.

accidental-slip-542551_640

Maybe the wife tripped on the curb as she boarded the bus to work. Or perhaps she left her wallet or keys at home and had to turn around to get them. It is unnecessary for the wife to tell her husband that she had done something stupid that concerns trivial things. The husband may be amused to hear these stupid acts, but it can also lower his appreciation of the wife’s character and may affect the marital relationship. The wife may selectively tell her husband (or not tell him at all) if she had done something that she feels stupid.

4. She Noticed that Her Husband has Gained Weight

stock-photo-he-crashed-after-a-lazy-day-678401248

Women can forget that body image comments aren’t just hurtful for females, they can also harm men. Telling the husband that he gains weight may be unnecessary especially if there is no serious health issues are involved. Unmarried and young people are more concerned with their looks and weight in order to be desirable during courtship. But once two people are already married and more preoccupied with raising a family, the concern for physical appearance and weight may take a backseat. The husband’s gaining a weight can be a good occasion for the wife to invite him to go to the gym with her. Working out together in a gym can become a good opportunity for the husband and the wife to improve their personal bonding.

5. She Prepared a Special Date or Booked a Special Vacation

wine-2251916_640

Of course, this is self-explanatory. Preparing for a special date or vacation to celebrate a wedding anniversary or the husband’s birthday must obviously be done in secret. It is usually the wife who often remembers special occasions or anniversaries. Making some surprises for the husband once in a while can enhance the marital relationship and personal intimacy between spouses.

eat-2616323_640

Christian Teaching on Marriage

Marriage is sacred: What God has united, let no man put asunder (Matthew 9:16).

255358a92f88474eef25878b5cbe62cc

Some Rules for a Happy Marriage, especially for newly weds:

funny-advice-marriage-newlyweds

Photo Credit: Krexy.com

Photo Credit (except those with attribution): Pixabay.com

Thank you for reading this post. Sign up with our newsletter or follow this website via email for more updates.

Why Men Suffer More Badly than Women after Breakups

sad low kii savage GIF by Kiiara

Many assume that women would suffer more trauma than men after an ending of a serious relationship. This conclusion may be true in the economic realm, especially if the female partners or wives are dependent on their boyfriends and husbands for support. But in the emotional or psychological realm, the case may be different. Women tend to perform well in coping with the emotional pains after a breakup in a relationship compared to men!

A study by Perilloux and Buss (2008) indicated that knowing who among the men and women would suffer more pain in coping with a breakup would depend on who are the rejectors and rejectees.

Animated GIF

Both men and women who were rejected, compared with those who did the rejecting, experienced more depression, loss of self-esteem, and rumination. But between men and women who were both rejected after a serious relationship, men tend to suffer more emotional hardships than women.

If men were rejected (rejectees) by their girlfriends and housewives (rejectors) in serious relationships, they tend to cope very badly after breakups compared to women (rejectees). Some studies revealed that women typically report experiencing more benefits after the breakup and men report poorer adjustment (e.g.Avellar & Smock, 2005; Bevvino and Sharkin, 2003; Haugaard and Seri, 2003).

mad men cry GIF

In addition, since men tend to be more romantic and more involved in establishing and maintaining a romantic or marital relationship, they experience more frustrations compared to their female partners after a divorce or separation. To enhance their romantic union, men tend to invest more time and resources than women. This serious investment of male partners in a romantic or marital union can lead to large costs if the relationship is terminated. Breakups can be costly and emotionally devastating to men when their ladies decide to discontinue the relationships.

x-men cry GIF

Why Men Deal with Breakups More Badly than Women

1. Although they tend to have more business and social connections as well as personal friends than women in public life, men generally have less intimate friends to confide their emotional problems compared to women. In terms of quality and intimacy in personal relationships, women tend to have deeper social bonding with their peers, cliques, and friends than men. Women tend to share more of their negative emotional experiences with their inner circles of friends than men.

women GIF by buzzfeedladylike

2. Men tend to hide their emotions compared to women. In a patriarchal society, men are socialized by their parents to be strong, logical, active, and masculine in their personal ways. Sons are expected to avoid signs of femininity in dealing with problems of life.

CyclonesTV strong man GIF

Although they are trained to be strong in real life problems, they are not socialized to handle well emotional problems such as divorce or serious breakups in romantic relationships. Thus, when their girlfriends and wives decide to end the relationship, they usually experience strong depression, loneliness, and imbalance in their daily routine. Men’s main confidante in romantic and marital relationships are usually their female partners. Thus, if the latter would divorce and reject them, the separation and emotional hurt are indeed very painful to them. In this case, many would resort to palliatives such as using drugs and alcoholism just to forget the past and minimize the emotional suffering.

charlie sheen drinking GIF

3. Men do not often express negative emotions compared to women (e.g., Burke et al., 1976; Levenson et al., 1994). Some studies have shown that there are gender differences in the stressful reactions to coping with negative daily life events and that women are more likely to use negative emotion-related coping strategies such as cognitive rumination and seeking emotional support than men (Matud, 2004; Tamres et al., 2002).

chatting african american GIF

Conclusion

In sum, it is true that men, especially the breadwinners, can easily cope well after a divorce or separation than women in the economic realm. But in the area of emotional and psychological adjustments, men tend to suffer more emotional pain and trauma and recover badly after a breakup compared to women. The socialization process or social upbringing of men in society that emphasizes reason, achievement, suppression of negative emotions, and focus on economic and social pursuits, rather than on fulfilling emotional needs for males, is a major contributory factor on why men tend to have less intimate friends and tend to be inhibited to share their emotional problems after a breakup.

Thank you for reading this post. Feel free to like, comment, or share it with your friends and followers. Cheers and best wishes!

GIF Credits: Giphy.com

References

Avellar, S., and Smock, P.J. (2005). The economic consequences of the dissolution of cohabiting unions. Journal of Marriage and Family, 67, 315327.

Bevvino, D.L., and Sharkin, B.S. (2003). Divorce adjustment as a function of finding meaning and gender differences. Journal of Divorce and Remarriage, 39, 8197.

Burke, R. J., Weir, T., & Harrison, D. (1976). Disclosure of problems and tensions experienced by marital partners. Psychological Reports, 38, 531–542.

Haugaard, J.J., and Seri, L.G. (2003). Stalking and other forms of intrusive contact after the dissolution of adolescent dating or romantic relationships. Violence and Victims, 18, 279297.

Levenson, R. W., Carstensen, L. L., & Gottman, J. M. (1994). The influence of age and gender on affect, physiology, and their interrelations: A study of long-term marriages. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 67, 56–68.

Matud, M. P. (2004). Gender differences in stress and coping styles. Personality and Individual Differences, 37, 1401-1415.

Perriloux, C and Buss, D. (2008). Breaking up Romantic Relationships: Costs Experienced and Coping Strategies Deployed. Evolutionary Psychology. 

Tamres, L. K., Janicki, D., & Helgeson, V. S. (2002). Sex differences in coping behavior: A meta-analytic review and an examination of relative coping. Personality and Social Psychology Review, 6, 2-30.

7 Top Signs Your Husband is Cheating in Your Marriage

real housewives of orange county divorce GIF

1. He is often angry, critical and even at times cruel.

angry the office GIF

One study showed that 70% of those surveyed reported this sign often coupled with emotional and verbal abuse, constant put downs and little to no patience. One woman reported that at the worst point he was more than disrespectful. He was just plain rude, impatient, angry and aggressive. He was constantly picking fights and refused to help out in the home or with our children. He always complain even in trivial things.

2. He becomes emotionally distant, withdrawn or depressed.

angry jim carrey GIF

Most of those who had been cheated on reported this type of behavior. The husband becomes became self-absorbed and living as if he was single with his own agenda and plans. He became more and more disinterested in his wife, as well as in his family, friends, and daily needs.

3. He complains that he is being controlled, and yet he is guilty of controlling his wife.

angry face GIF by Kim's Convenience

A husband who often tells his wife that he needs space and don’t want to be bothered can be a sign that his mind is preoccupied with something. Just like any person who is in love, your husband is probably daydreaming about his new crush and may also be thinking how to maintain his extramarital affairs without being discovered by you, his wife.

4. He often comes home late or absent due to work: He increases his working hours, after work meetings, business trips, and out of town trips.

late people GIF

If the husband often extends his working hours or spends business trips in prolonged period of time which he does not normally do, then he is probably seeing somebody in a romantic interlude.

5. He is paying extra close attention to his appearance.

happy days hair GIF

A husband who is extra conscious about his looks is a sign that he is falling in love with another woman. If he is buying new clothes, losing weight, extra primping, working out at the gym and other sudden fitness endeavors, then he is making himself adorable to another person and to you, his wife.

6. He becomes inappropriately defensive when asked question about his whereabouts or his changed of appearance and behavior.

not fair john oliver GIF

If your husband is not hiding something, he can be spontaneous in his answers to your queries. But if he is cheating, he would always do his best to keep his secret and infidelity. He would always make excuses on why he changed his appearance, behavior, and whereabouts.

7. He becomes overly conscious for his need for ‘privateness’ and staying up late at night to work on the computer.

facebook posts GIF

If your husband is hiding an extramarital affairs, he would always insist privacy in some things that he is doing at home that is related to his infidelity. If he uses his computer or smart phones, he would always put passwords or open his messages alone. He would easily become irritated if you would intrude into his own private space and see what he is doing with his gadgets.

Concluding Words

secret latoya jackson GIF

Seeing all or some of these signs in your husband is not a guarantee that your husband is indeed unfaithful. These are just signs that need to be verified. They are only some common indicators that point to infidelity in marriage. Your husband would not normally exhibit a sudden change of behavior and attitude towards you as wife and your children if he is not distracted by an affair with another woman.

true detective mel GIF

These alerts must, however, be validated by concrete proof or evidence. Hiring a detective to investigate can be an option. As a wife you must first do a scientific research if you notice some of these signs in your husband before jumping into the conclusion that his having an affair with another person. Remember that marriage is a lifetime commitment that needs to be negotiated “til death do us part”. The welfare of your children must be your top priority in case your husband is indeed unfaithful. Think and pray before you decide to divorce him and remember what Christ said:

Image result for let no man separate what God has united christ

Photo Source: 316quotes.com

GIF Credits: Giphy.com

Reference

Bercht, A. (n.d. ). “10 Signs of Infidelity.” Retrieved from https://beyondaffairs.com/suspicion-confrontation/signs-of-infidelity/.

Thank you for reading this post. Subscribe or follow this blog for more updates.

Web Hosting



7 Top Signs Your Husband is Cheating in Your Marriage

real housewives of orange county divorce GIF

1. He is often angry, critical and even at times cruel.

angry the office GIF

One study showed that 70% of those surveyed reported this sign often coupled with emotional and verbal abuse, constant put downs and little to no patience. One woman reported that at the worst point he was more than disrespectful. He was just plain rude, impatient, angry and aggressive. He was constantly picking fights and refused to help out in the home or with our children. He always complain even in trivial things.

2. He becomes emotionally distant, withdrawn or depressed.

angry jim carrey GIF

Most of those who had been cheated on reported this type of behavior. The husband becomes became self-absorbed and living as if he was single with his own agenda and plans. He became more and more disinterested in his wife, as well as in his family, friends, and daily needs.

3. He complains that he is being controlled, and yet he is guilty of controlling his wife.

angry face GIF by Kim's Convenience

A husband who often tells his wife that he needs space and don’t want to be bothered can be a sign that his mind is preoccupied with something. Just like any person who is in love, your husband is probably daydreaming about his new crush and may also be thinking how to maintain his extramarital affairs without being discovered by you, his wife.

4. He often comes home late or absent due to work: He increases his working hours, after work meetings, business trips, and out of town trips.

late people GIF

If the husband often extends his working hours or spends business trips in prolonged period of time which he does not normally do, then he is probably seeing somebody in a romantic interlude.

5. He is paying extra close attention to his appearance.

happy days hair GIF

A husband who is extra conscious about his looks is a sign that he is falling in love with another woman. If he is buying new clothes, losing weight, extra primping, working out at the gym and other sudden fitness endeavors, then he is making himself adorable to another person and to you, his wife.

6. He becomes inappropriately defensive when asked question about his whereabouts or his changed of appearance and behavior.

not fair john oliver GIF

If your husband is not hiding something, he can be spontaneous in his answers to your queries. But if he is cheating, he would always do his best to keep his secret and infidelity. He would always make excuses on why he changed his appearance, behavior, and whereabouts.

7. He becomes overly conscious for his need for ‘privateness’ and staying up late at night to work on the computer.

facebook posts GIF

If your husband is hiding an extramarital affairs, he would always insist privacy in some things that he is doing at home that is related to his infidelity. If he uses his computer or smart phones, he would always put passwords or open his messages alone. He would easily become irritated if you would intrude into his own private space and see what he is doing with his gadgets.

Concluding Words

secret latoya jackson GIF

Seeing all or some of these signs in your husband is not a guarantee that your husband is indeed unfaithful. These are just signs that need to be verified. They are only some common indicators that point to infidelity in marriage. Your husband would not normally exhibit a sudden change of behavior and attitude towards you as wife and your children if he is not distracted by an affair with another woman.

true detective mel GIF

These alerts must, however, be validated by concrete proof or evidence. Hiring a detective to investigate can be an option. As a wife you must first do a scientific research if you notice some of these signs in your husband before jumping into the conclusion that his having an affair with another person. Remember that marriage is a lifetime commitment that needs to be negotiated “til death do us part”. The welfare of your children must be your top priority in case your husband is indeed unfaithful. Think and pray before you decide to divorce him and remember what Christ said:

Image result for let no man separate what God has united christ

Photo Source: 316quotes.com

GIF Credits: Giphy.com

Reference

Bercht, A. (n.d. ). “10 Signs of Infidelity.” Retrieved from https://beyondaffairs.com/suspicion-confrontation/signs-of-infidelity/.

Thank you for reading this post. Subscribe or follow this blog for more updates.

Web Hosting



5 Secrets Wives Won’t Tell their Husbands

1. Her True Feelings about Her Past Boyfriends.

omar-medina-films-1612679_640

Web Hosting

It is always a taboo or prohibited for a wife to tell her husband how she felt with her former boyfriends or past partners. Even if the husband would personally ask her, the wife would not usually reveal all about her past relationships, especially if she feels that her secrets can affect the marital relationship.

The wife usually keeps secret her special feelings with her former boyfriends or partners to avoid the jealous feelings of the husband. Keeping this type of secret could benefit the marriage. Revealing how she felt with ex-boyfriends can hurt his feelings. What is past should stay in the past.

2. Her Sexual History

couple-2300103_640

Telling the wife’s past sexual history to her husband, especially she had different partners in the past, would be unnecessary as this could cause jealously or personal conflict–unless, of course, the wife is infected with STD that can affect the husband’s health. The topic on her past sexual history can also bring about harsh judgment and ridicule and overshadows her true character. While it’s a good idea to talk about how you maintain your sexual health and promote sexual responsibility, the rest of the wife’s sexual past is her business only.

3. She Did Something Dumb.

accidental-slip-542551_640

Maybe the wife tripped on the curb as she boarded the bus to work. Or perhaps she left her wallet or keys at home and had to turn around to get them. It is unnecessary for the wife to tell her husband that she had done something stupid that concerns trivial things. The husband may be amused to hear these stupid acts, but it can also lower his appreciation of the wife’s character and may affect the marital relationship. The wife may selectively tell her husband (or not tell him at all) if she had done something that she feels stupid.

4. She Noticed that Her Husband has Gained Weight

stock-photo-he-crashed-after-a-lazy-day-678401248

Women can forget that body image comments aren’t just hurtful for females, they can also harm men. Telling the husband that he gains weight may be unnecessary especially if there is no serious health issues are involved. Unmarried and young people are more concerned with their looks and weight in order to be desirable during courtship. But once two people are already married and more preoccupied with raising a family, the concern for physical appearance and weight may take a backseat. The husband’s gaining a weight can be a good occasion for the wife to invite him to go to the gym with her. Working out together in a gym can become a good opportunity for the husband and the wife to improve their personal bonding.

5. She Prepared a Special Date or Booked a Special Vacation

wine-2251916_640

Of course, this is self-explanatory. Preparing for a special date or vacation to celebrate a wedding anniversary or the husband’s birthday must obviously be done in secret. It is usually the wife who often remembers special occasions or anniversaries. Making some surprises for the husband once in a while can enhance the marital relationship and personal intimacy between spouses.

eat-2616323_640

Christian Teaching on Marriage

Marriage is sacred: What God has united, let no man put asunder (Matthew 9:16).

255358a92f88474eef25878b5cbe62cc

Some Rules for a Happy Marriage, especially for newly weds:

funny-advice-marriage-newlyweds

Photo Credit: Krexy.com

Photo Credit (except those with attribution): Pixabay.com

Thank you for reading this post. Sign up with our newsletter or follow this website via email for more updates.